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  • Writer's picturelaurenjanowiecki

Rewire the Body | Eat This Not That

Sorry for the delay fam. We had our Mini Dental Implant day for a cause on Monday and that afternoon my 6 year old broke his arm at school. Needless to say I have been out for a couple days. To answer your questions- yes, he is doing great, he is a little trooper and handled everything super well. His pain has been manageable- we are just watching that finger swelling. We are all just trying to get back in the swing of life and get rest whenever we can.

So we have all heard and seen the different "eat this vs that" stuff. I know I have. And let me preface this by saying it is so great that we are trying to advance our modern food options by offering the 'healthy' version of things. But lets be honest, some of the modern substitutes for our favorite sinful foods, are absolutely horrible.

Have you ever had gluten free high protein low carb chickpea pasta.... yeah, its about as bad as you can imagine. You realllly have to pair it with a meaty & strong marinara to mask the strange chickpea flavor and texture, or rich flavorful bolognese for it to be even slightly enjoyable. Which, when I did do a bolognese I will admit it was decent. BUT... I tried it with tomato soup (my weird family tradition- don't judge) and for the first time in my life, didn't finish my bowl. All I could taste was the wierd pungent flavor and the texture was so off... And I can eat pretty much anything. It was rough. So moral of the story here is that healthy food swaps are not as easy as some will lead you to believe.

The fake sugars, healthy carb substitutes, and waxy 'chocolate' alternatives are not the only option for indulgence while retaining your girlish figure. Yes, your diet should be healthy. Ideally, it should not contain high amounts of saturated fats or refined sugars. However, I don't think replacing the "bad stuff" with tasteless and strangely textured alternatives needs to be the only option here. What I have found works best for me is this:


And yes, I do mean the full fat, full calorie, full carb pasta. That delicious hot bowl of spaghetti, take out box of pad Thai, or plate of crab & alfredo linguini. That decadent chocolate cake a la mode. BUT, only eat it once a week. Nobody is going to loose weight eating daily plates of 1,800 calorie crab and alfredo linguini (not the way I make it anyway) BUT, indulging in it every once in awhile- there is nothing wrong with that. In fact, when I eat the real thing, I end up eating far less calories than when I try to substitute that craving for something else.

Same with pizza. or Cake. Or ice cream. Whatever your 'thing' is, do it right, but don't do it often. Everything in moderation. Check out the example from Ilona below.

This photo (and most of them below) are from a giant article written by a wonderful blogger that goes by Ilona. Go check her out.

Ilona really puts in perspective how the food swap should actually look her article titled:

"Woman Shows How Easy It Is To Lose Weight By Making 39 Genius Food Swaps"

You can view the original page source and article here.

Below I have posted her substitute photos that she posted in her above article and have (per usual) narrated each with my own personal opinions.

Ok, so this looks like your standard substitutions. Dark chocolate i happen to prefer so this wasnt difficult for me. We use coconut oil for literally everything in our house so that wasnt a sacrifice for us. However, back off my sour cream.

My fiance will tell you right now that he downright refuses to eat my left over Chipotle (and the man will literally eat anything). Why you ask? Because I LOVE my sour cream and I use a healthy size dollop (or three) in my bowl. Take away anything else, but my sour cream is sacred. So that, for me, what the biggest challenge. We substitute plain non-fat greek yogurt around the house, and I definitely enjoy it... but my Chipotle gets the real stuff. In fact, I do light rice and no cheese JUST so I can have my guilt free sour cream. Judge me, but calories are calories.

Ok so anyone who knows me will tell you- I love my starbucks. Giving up my large salted caramel frappacino sub coconut milk, drizzle with caramel, and add a shot of espresso... that was one of the harder choices I have made. But it saves me 680 calories and $7 every time I make that choice. The above photo really hit home for me because of that. In last weeks article I mentioned that my downfall was beverages. That has definitely been a challenge for me. Don't get me wrong I love water, however, Milk and caffeinated drinks (dr. pepper cherry & monster) are my automatic go-to's.

I cant tell you how many times I would swing through a Starbucks or Tim Horton's on my way to work a wedding and grab one of these bad boys. And for what? Nearly a thousand empty calories and my entire daily value of refined sugars. I love bagels also and I didn't realize that an everything bagel with extra cream cheese was literally 490 calories. This was part of my calorie awareness that struck me so hard. I was investing my entire days worth of calories in a passive "snack"... not even a full meal! And not to mention between the drink and the bagel I was spending about $12 each time! It was just not a sustainable habit.

Being more calorie aware has significantly helped my make those choices throughout the day. Do I still have Starbucks every once in awhile? Yes, of course. But its once a month now, not once a day.

Ok, so this goes back to my Calories article as well- the real calories in the "healthy" fast food choices I thought I was making. Guys, just because it seems healthy, that doesn't mean it is or that it has low calories. In fact, most of the time if it is from a restaurant, it is way higher in sodium, preservatives, and calories than you would expect.

Full disclosure, not a whole lot from this photo surprised me. I've assumed for a long time that subway probably wasn't the healthiest thing for you... lets be honest its a pile of dry toasted bread that you need 1/4 lb of mayonnaise just to swallow. Not going to lie, I did always assumed the tortilla wrap substitution was good for you though. Little did i know that the wrap alone is nearly 400 calories. McDonalds in general is pretty much known as that "horrible fast food place", so I was actually surprised that a McDoubles protein to calorie ratio was so great.

BUT The most eye opening thing on this list, for me, was actually the oatmeal. I'm not a huge oatmeal person, however, my son loves it so I keep it around the house. I wasn't surprised to find that the calories in McDonalds oatmeal is right around 300. But, when I looked up the sugar and calories in the instant oatmeal I had at the house, I was shocked. Don't get me wrong, there are healthy oatmeal options, just apparently not the variety I was buying and giving my son every morning. I have since switched to raw steel cut version and pumped it up with coconut milk, cinnamon, omega-3 rich kerrygold irish butter, coconut flakes, chopped nuts, and a dash of sugar free maple syrup. There are also the healthy instant brands I am dying to try-

Thinkthin Protein & Fiber Oatmeal

GFB protein Oatmeal

Quaker Real Medleys Instant Oatmeal

I'll let you guys know how these brands work out. I am especially excited about that think thin banana bread option... I'm definitely a banana girl.

OK, so aside from your avocado oil Mayo, there is also your coconut oil mayo, plain old mustard alternative, or (my personal favorite) greek yogurt. I love big bold flavors so for sandwhiches and tuna, my mayo alternative is chipotle greek yogurt. My favorite recipe is below. (your welcome.)

In a food processor or blender combine:

1 cup plain non-fat greek yogurt

3-4 canned chipotle peppers in adobo sauce (depending on how hot you want it)

1 tbs adobo sauce

1/2 lime, juice and zest